Or long time no leaves or you’re eating the head does not know how to end the thing with that person who’s so horny it gets you. Because you’re here again, trying to figure out what luck will run your genitals this week, thirsty of sex, and of hosts as breads. Because here you are going to receive everything: the milks are on our own, the powder will depend on the position of the stars. For more information, refer to your tarot reader.
We have to give you the congratulations. After months and months of being a boring anti-social, you have finally come out of your cave and you’ve connected with the people. And you have been given so well that even you were fucking and all. So, obviously, this weekend, you’re going to paste a polvazo epic with your new flirt. Of those that never end, you repeat, and after I go so hungry that you end up asking for a pizza at 2 in the morning in any weird place. But so much the sex as the pizza hawaiian I know to glory (and yes that is difficult). So don’t blow it, that we know.
You spend hours and hours looking at profiles of your ex on all the social networks that exist and twisting of rage to see how well it is carrying. You are so hung that you just lack to look at their stories of Instagram, but it would be too pathetic to know that he spies. So no, you’re not going to fuck because you’re so desperate that you can’t peel it off of the head and not even think of asking a ‘autoapaño’. Now, sex does not exist for you. But be very careful with the digievoluciones to amoeba asexual. Someday you’ll have to go back to the meat market or, at this step, your virginity will grow back. We hope it will be soon.
HAHAHA. Fuck it says.
Finally came the sweet time you had waiting for half a year: your fucking week of summer vacation. You know you are going to fuck you because you have planned and, if not, for you would not be ‘vacation’. You have it all tied up: your churri, your airbnb, your choice of crystal clear water infested with foreigners with the back in the flesh and many condoms to use in the evenings (and some day, it looks that now it bears that fuck in public places). “Enjoy very much” you will say to your parents. Let them case, because you’ll see it in another one of these until October with luck. So, you know, who wants to go sightseeing if you can spend all afternoon on four legs? What envy us. Besiiiiiiiiiiiiiis.
You’re trying to change your partner with sex. And that doesn’t work as well. Well, and in any way. It was already like that when you met each other and, after a time, that before you seemed so ‘kuki’ now gives you so much rage that you want to kill each time you do it. So, to avoid that will leave a lump in the neck of reprimirte, you lower your pants and you put yourselves at the mess. ERROR. We have consulted with Hope Grace (because yours is a serious case) , and she told us that this weekend you should opt for abstinence and having a charlita those that clarify things. Do it or exploit.
Since the stars spend your health this weekend, our dear Gustavo Adolfo Bécquer you have dedicated a poemilla.
“A gaze, a world,
for a smile, a sky,
for a powder… I don’t know
that would be a powder!”
SísísísísíSÍ. You take a lot of time currándotelo and at the end you’ll have your time fucker of the year. Because everyone knows that when one summers in a village puts a foot there, all over the world are fixed on him. And there you go you with your own roll that you have created by mixing the influencers that you love and that ass that you’ve pounded in the gym for months so that SHE (and only she) fix it for you at once. Your crush from childhood is your damn thorn and this weekend begins the summer that is going to get, finally, you move closer to your lips (and your corasonsito). Don’t forget to be nice, it is important.
Or in the videos more pigs of YouPorn, you have seen what you are going to do this weekend. Without knowing how, that party, which organized the cousin of I don’t know what a friend of your friend and that you had been invited you will end up putting picantona. You can choose to relax and live the experience or largarte and drop a ‘this is not going with me.’ But we all know that you molas much and you’ll be to find out up to what point it gets sow the thing and participate if the body asks. You’re going to give it my all and to have one of those anecdotes insurmountable will to talk for hours with your colleagues. This weekend you you’ll select one of those ‘I was there, and was the host’. No te rajes.
Having a follamigo is happening to bill and comes to mind the wacky and inconceivable idea that you’re taking love. Not fond of the stick, “hold me tight when we do it,” but sweetheart, “on Friday we will celebrate the birthday of my grandfather in the free buffet chinese, do you want to come?”. Cuidadín with that, we don’t want your pinchito trusted to run despavorido to the minimum that will do the spoon watching Netflix in your bed. You have made it clear several times that among you there are only orgasms and good vibes and you to come to clinging to him indirect. Why do you think that one day it will change the story and ask you for marriage? In order to. As you’re not going to be able to aguantarle and some will soltarás. So no, this weekend, do not click.
This month Jupiter has wanted to summarize your weekend in one slogan:
The rub is going to end (Wipp Express).
There we leave it.
“In summer league”, they said. “You’ll see as this year you put on the boots”, they said. But not for you. You live in a parallel world in which the people are not the maja and the clubs to which you go are full of people that it is impossible to speak, much less take a cap worth. So did you get into this bind over the internet because you said that it was the habitat of the lonely people but cool (like you), but wake up a gif and just find out. Girl, back off and go to an animal shelter to save a soul candida that is as single as you are, or dedicated your life to the onanism to alleviate tensions. Blessings and good night.
“I like you when callas because estás as absent,
and you hear me from afar, and my voice don’t touch.”
This weekend, for you, not a voice or anything, sorry.